Smelly n Khadoos Co-passanger

This blog is dedicated to my encounter with a Smelly and a khadoos Co-passenger..

It was like any other day, I went soon to catch a good place in my 5:15 bus, sky looked clear, no signs of rain, rain means leakage in the window seat.. So I decided to hold a window seat in my office bus enroute to home.. A friend S had said she would come.. but finally did not turn up..

I generally prefer to sit alone, this was not true before marriage coz me n Friend G used to go in the same route, same bus and all the time just chat chat n chat...Any amount of time was just not enough for us.. The same doesn't hold good anymore as our routs hv changed n I prefer solitude to unwind my day... I either read a book or doze off depending on the mood..

Today was one such day where I decided to read my newly picked "The Man in the Brown Coat" by Agatha Christie... The bus was not full and hence no one came next to me.. I had a smile in my face just imagining the whole 2 seats to myself hammmm... just when the bus was about to start there came 3- 4 people running towards our bus... The smile faded as I saw a Man who came to sit next to me.. I was unhappy coz I couldn't hv 2 seats to myself anymore...

Oh did I tell you there is a cute little angel in our bus, A very cute baby whose mom keeps her in the crush in office and they come daily in our bus.. The doll is very cute and looks at everyone in the bus and grabs the attention especially to boys and gives them a sweet smile..

As soon as the bus started I realized some stinking foul smell, first I thought may be something from outside then I realized that it was the sweat smell coming from the guy sitting next to me... Aaaaaaaaagrrrr..

It was so string that I felt pukish.. I cudnt resist but opened the window completely, tried to concentrate elsewhere, started reading my nivel, did everything that I could do to distract myself but the odor was so strong and my nostrils so sharp that I immediately started frowning n sulking..

I even stared at him several times more so he lowers his hands but in vain,, how could I have said?

Mr Foul Smell keep ur hand down? or

Stop smelling You smelly Moron?  or

Why dont you use a Deodorant

Upon that friend G smsed me saying "There is a Handsome guy in the bus Very Cute smile"

Oh No not now..... especially when I am suffering here... :'(

I looked at the man's face to see if he was handsome, he was fair, bearded, expressionless face. He did not seemed handsome to me for all the foul smell he was generating.. He was kind of holding his breath too.. I was worried where his breath also imparts some more foul smell... Mummmmyyyyy save me

I smsed back saying I was stuck in this situation for which she replied back saying "Enjoy" Grrrrr

I said "khadoos" because the cute angel got up from her nap and started looking around for the familiar faces to receive attention, other passengers smiled back at her, some even started playing with her, soon her attention caught this man who was sitting next to me.. I could see how she started staring at him for a long time...

She first had an expression which said "Who are you? Are u new to this bus??"

No change in expression in that man's face after looking at the doll
Next she started making sounds looking at him, as if saying "Ok hello how are u new guy in the bus"
No change in Expression
She gave a nice sweet smile making sounds still smiling still staring for a long long time sitting very close by that man...
Still no expression change in him...

Does Kadoos sound right now??

I was like- "How come someone not smile back at a cute sweet smiling baby who is kept on staring at you"?? Thanks god my journey ended with this smelly khadoos stranger..

Observations + Cafeteria

I am popular among friends for being a keen observer especially observing people and their behaviors.. This sometimes puts me in a fix situation coz I end up seeing + imagining things that make me laugh which others fail to watch/imagine…Sometimes I don’t do it intentionally but some crazy, stupid actions of people just catches my attention by itself, and when it happens I have no choice but to visualize as well as involuntarily my imagination triggers and just goes frenzy!! Since I commute a lot, I mean from Home to office and Vice versa this is my Nice timepaas.. I end up watching people, their behavior, dressing sense, spoken language etc etc.. Even without wanting to watch some people catch attention.

• Be it their funny voice/Noise
• Be it their funny dressing style
• Be it their loud voice on mobile phones
• Be it their singing when their headphones in On
• Be it their funny conversations

I categories some people as "Attention seekers" and some characteristics of the AS are:
Speaking loudly over the phone abt GF/BF their achievements, their shopping trips (including the price tags) their salaries, work place etc…

Some random cafetaria observations

Yap Yap Sonu…

In Office cafeteria A guy, PD(who btw sings in the Office -------Band, yeah I agree he is a good singer, but definitely not Sonu Nigam) always sits with a bunch of gals (ONLY gals),may be coz guys cant bare him, keeps on yapping and yapping, be it his review on movies or opinion on some issue, knowledge on fashion/brand etc.. I call it non-stop nonsense/bakwaas… Blah Blah Blah… Poor gals who might have just encountered Monday blues… (This observation happened on a Monday so..) come to offc after a nice weekend, wanting to have a peaceful breakfast in the lovely weather, ends up with this yapping guy… I noticed that the gals were all silent, no one in the gang talks but this PD… I was sitting there watch the expression of the gals…. I imagine that these words will be constantly running in their minds:

"Cmmon man Give us a break dude!!, Stop it we are not interested!!" … :) :D :P

Feed me Baby
Offc Cafeteria a group of guys + gals, I am sure they are fresher's… I could see from Behind a gal is feeding food to the other… I was like eeeeeeek not here in Office dear…. Just informed a friend G and we both started looking at them… G asked me "who is it who fed just now??" I was about to say the gal I Brown salwaar and there she started feeding again and this time to a Guy…. Oh God!!!!!!! G exclaimed "Oh my God!!" we both stared at each other @ the same time…. Saying "Yeeeaaaaaaah" . Now we were anxious to see that gal who was feeding every random person in their group thinking.. Lets see how that gal looks like…. We both were like "Turn Turn Turn" …. I just recall the scene where SRK Says "Muuud Muuuud, Agar tum Mudhi toh tum muhjse pyaar karthin ho" to Kajol in one of my Fav movie DDLJ….. Ok coming back we were eager to see her face,,,, She turns and we were like eeeeeeeh
That actually meant that she was very ordinary to look at and nothing special then why did that guy (who was fed, infact another spiky but with Natural spikes) was very amused when he was fed…… Ok done with the feeding group… From that day till date the feeding lady + the natural Spiky is added to out Observation List….. :) :D :P

Bag Gang (Christened by friend L)
A group of around 5 to 6 gals, daily seen for breakfast and for Lunch always carry their bags with them…. Are they in a hurry to go anywhere after that?? Are they showing off their bags?? (Not that everyone ahs a nice handbag but yes 1 or 2 ladies have nice sexy totes…) Are they careful and not wanting to leave their handbags @ the work station??
Are they carrying any treasure??? (Here is where my Imagination ignitez…) Are they carrying missiles???? Haammmm I need to crack this someday….
Today L, known for her clumsiness had for some strange reason had got her Handbag to the Cafeteria for Bfast and when she saw the Bang gang she soon started saying "Oh No I also look like one member of the Bag Gang Today" Ha ha ha

wanna membership in Bag Gang?????????Log on to  Baggang@xyzcompay.com
Mandatory stuff: Handbag, any size any shape, willing to carry it always around the campus, failing to which will be charged with a punishment to carry everyone's bag in the gang for 2 days.. He he he crazy Gang I should say…

Shaakini and Dhaakini (Christened partly by G and Partly Me)
2 gals new to the Company entered the cafeteria while we were having Lunch. Everyone in the café started Turing and looking at the 2 gals. Both anorexic left their hair undone (I guess that’s fashion now…) one had a long wavy hair and the other short knotted in a crazy fashion.. Things that are common to both is the THICK kajal and Mascara… As soon as G saw them she blurted out "Shaakini" which is actually a name of a female demon in the Hindu mythology… I felt bad for the other and immediately added the rhyme "Dhaakini" for the other… :P...Day in and Day out their kajal kept on increasing by thickness and the waist kept on decreasing by millimeters… Soon they had welcomed few more members to the demons group and it became a ritual to watch them daily…

For the matter of fact L gave a suggestion that G also can join the gang… All she had to do was leave her hair down (which BTW she never does in Off but reserves it only for the weekends.. For the special few to see n enjoy :D) put lot of Kajal and maskara, the option is still open with G but G hesitates to go and join the Shak Dhak gang….

G's Crush
Wah she is so good looking!! Hey look at her dress/kurta/jeans top etc etc… Wah look @ her new Hair Cut, wah re she looks very cute… Good I am sitting her I can have a good view of her… You know what she comes in my Bus,…. Yaar I need to talk to her… I Need to ask where she buys her clothes from? where she got haircut from??

Don’t gemme wrong these are the words from G's mouth and that gal is occupied in G's mind not mine… How she stares @ her and never tires talking abt her haircut/ Clothes / Cute smile…. Me n L just keep mum when G starts praising her…

I cant deny coz she has a good taste, she dresses up real nice and carries it well, yes the haircut suits her tooo. But I dint find her very much attractive oh oh no.. Not that I am possessive abt G that she is eyeing on her… (Yeah we are good friends and our friend R(Guy) teases us both and says that I am the BF and G the GF etc etc..) But I feel that the G's current crush is lack of one thing and that one thing is the charm…. The smile the brightness.. She mostly looks little dull to me coz irrespective of all the good stuff she wears, good haircut and good face she lacks the charm coz she doesn’t smile much,… the much needed smile is missing in her face,.. I am sure she looks very very pretty of only she smiles a little… :)

On a 5:15 bus sms exchange between me and G
G- "Hey that gal is looking very pretty today"
Me- "Who dear"
G- I have told you na that haircut waali (drooling) she looks sakkath (slang in kannada for mast) I wanna talk to her..
Me- (Little J) Please go ahead, but don’t ditch me dear :(
G- I can never ditch you, this is just attraction u know.
Me- Then go ahead and Enjoy darling…
End of the sms conversation, I happily slept in the bus and I m sure G would be droooling over her Dress/Haircut etc…
P.S- Have fun G and don’t blame me for this post, I couldn’t resist but put this...

L's Fav- Spiky
I have already dedicated a Blog to Spiky "Its Ok No problem" here are some of his behaviors because of which he is featured here too…
I assume he is a fresher, at least as per L's observation he is a fresher, Loner, Crazy, eyes always searches for gals, a big wide smile on his face when he sees gals, smiles @ any random person (mostly gals), roams around alone, joins any random group for lunch and just watches everyone in the group and gives them a wide mouthed smile so that the onlooker thinks that he is one among them…

I had not noticed him until one day when we were 4 of us in a table having lunch and this spiky came in and asked if the chair was empty, Not realizing that he would typically sit there we said yes it is empty. We expected he would pull it and take it elsewhere but to my surprise he pulled and sat with us, and started staring @ L and G with a smile revealing his bunny teeth, I was shocked to see that neither G nor L smiled back but were frowning, later G whispered to me that this guy is crazy and stares and smiles @ any random gal…
From that day till now I love watching G's and L's reaction when spiky passes by, G just has a straight face and L blurts out "Oh no here come Mr. Skipy"..
Poor Spiky…. I guess he needs company, L would be a suitable one probably...

Its ok No Problem!

,,,One Morning in the offc cafeteria as usual me and my friend G went to have bfast. We decided that we both will have idli/vada and coffee.

Since I was standing in the Queue I bought the coupons together for us. The cashier gave me the coupon and I picked it up without realizing that I had also taken the coupon of the person XYZ who was just in front of me..
G and me proceeded to take our Idli/Vad, I had learnt from G that he is very crazy guy and that he keeps on looking @ any random gal in fact all the gals in the vicinity, sits alone for lunch/bfast/Tea, laughs to himself etc etc… We just happened to see him and G started telling "Oh God here comes Spiky!!"

Within no time Mr Spiky came to me and asked-
Spiky " Excuse me, plz can you check if you have taken my coupon by mistake?"
Me- Checking the coupons in my hand, realized that I haven taken his too by mistake "Oh yeah here it is"
Spiky- "I am very Sorry"
Me- Very proudly(I don’t know Y I did it "That’s Ok not a problem"
G was watching our conversation and pointed out saying "Instead of you asking sorry he asked, and you happily said No problem????"

That was when I realized...Oh  yeah… How stupid of me… Instead of being sorry how Proudly I said "That’s ok Not a problem"            I felt little embarrassed by my act but G and me both burst out laughing...

Till date whenever I see My Spiky I feel like telling.. Its ok not a problem… :) :D :P